Tales of a lost space cadet

On my planet, everyone has a 3-minute attention span. So it was hard to adjust to Earth, where beings retain thoughts for long periods. I graduated from an institution where beings sat in front of rectangular plastics and attended meetings where an older being spoke in front of younger, dirtier ones. For fun, they consumed alcohol, shook in crowded, humid rooms and touched each other's privates. Luckily, I work with smaller beings now, who have the same attention span as me.