Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Popular searches in my Friendster network

What is the purpose of the “popular searches in my network” feature on Friendster? I wonder how they compile this crap, and why one would want to know what their friends are searching. All it is doing is scaring me away from my friends. Here is the list and my commentary….

1. balenciaga bags- what the hell is that? I don’t even carry a bag unless it’s a book bag or camera bag.

2. jew singles- come on now, this is why Bengali men hate Jewish men and why Jewish women hate Bengali women. Not really…. I just think its eerie how of all the weddings I been to in recent years, I’ve noticed a trend of Bengali women ending up with two types of men. 1) South Indians with a collection of degrees and big hearts or 2) Jews with a collection of degrees and big wallets.

3. indian bridal fashion- it seems like all my friends are either 1) paired up, 2) talking about marrying the people they are dating, 3) getting married or 4) feeling bad about being single. Is this what life in mid-20’s is supposed to be like?

4. korean singles- I know a great place to meet Korean singles….. at Korean churches….. What? Don’t believe in Jesus? Well, before you cut off your testicles and get bitter, search your friendster network for korean singles.

5. tips on conversation- I am bad at conversation, but after a lifetime of awkward social skills, I found it helps to read newspapers and listen to NPR so you have something interesting to say at happy hour. Space Cadet always said “an hour of NPR before any social occasion makes you sound maaaad smart!”

6. what muppet are you quiz- I’m a mix between the animal and fozzie

7. INDIE HAIR STYLES- I will never understand indie rock kids….. Once I worked as a barber at an upscale salon that catered to indie kids….. guys and girls would walk in and say “I’m looking for something that looks like I haven’t had a haircut in years and haven’t washed it in days because I was so busy partying and touring with the band.” That’ll be $60 dollars I said, and here is a $30 bottle of pomade/wax so you can make your hair look dirty. Actually, I was never an indie hairstyle barber but that’s what I imagine it would be like. What every hipster should know: When you pay $100 on your hair, trying so hard to not look like a yuppie all it does is make you the ULTIMATE YUPPY, you are just a different type of consumer, you chump! Why don’t you go gain some weight before you get beat up by 115 pounds of Space Cadet. Actually, maybe I SHOULD become an indie hair stylist, they probably make more money than teachers and I need something to do in the summers besides being a Justice of the Peace.

8. how to get your boyfriend back- why would any girl want to do that? you are supposed to pray to never run into him again, and if you left on good terms hope that he finds someone really nice (but less cool and less attractive than you of course) and if you left on bad terms, that he ends up with a total bitch who will put him in his place.

9. physician salaries- how patronizing. Sometimes I feel bad for doctors. (Not really)

10. mazda RX-9- how did this end up in my network search? I don’t drive cars and neither do most of my friends.


At 11:24 PM, Blogger Fly said...

Thank god we don't have to measure teh quality of our friends based on the quality of their internet surfing.

Oh and contrary to what people might tell you...the Korean Singles search was not me. I know enough Korean chicks for my own good. Damn Khesekhi.

As one of your friends who does dedpend upon a car can I say I'm not enough into em to really care to do research. I just know Gas prices suck and so does jersey.

You can cut my hair if you want. I quit my job. No more important meetings with fascists in DC. Wooohoo!

At 8:42 AM, Blogger Justin Dula said...

I have many of the same friendster searches, including jew singles, indie hair, physician salaries. My number one is what drug are you. I guess that says something about my friendsters, but not much. I think that everyone has about the same friendster searches because people just click on what they see in the top on their search which perpetuates them. I mean friendster isn’t google.

At 10:13 AM, Anonymous rockstar said...

Best thing I ever did was delete my friendster account. I think losers do creepy things like spy on people they dont talk to any longer.

Or worse, they feel like they know people if they've seen their profile. I remember two morons at my party asking "is space cadet coming?" and then me replying "yes...wait how do you even know space cadet?" and one moron saying "on friendster. she looked interesting on friendster." No offense to space cadet, but no one should get excited over a profile. I was spooked.

Then again I'm paranoid and this could be completely normal behavior.

what's an indie hairstyle?

i've been called animal for years. stick with fozzie alone.

the fly shouldn't have paid for drinks at my party. i'm bengali offended.


At 11:47 AM, Blogger Space Cadet said...


I agree that it’s creepy to walk into a party and have people who you have never met in your life know where you are from, your favorite T.V. shows, etc. Two years ago, (when everybody and their mom started joining….. cue the slow violins and piano maestro) I considered committing Friendster suicide. Yes, it’s true.

But right after I got coked up and sat on the edge of a high building with my laptop, my finger dancing over the delete button, I remembered how MORE annoying it is to walk into a party (or any social function) and have EVERYONE ask you the same shit…. Where are you from? What do you do? How old are you? I would feel like wearing a signboard or have my vital stats written on my forehead.

I choose to be creeped out rather than annoyed. I think more and more it is becoming normal behavior. I have even had potential employers Google me and call me about my songs about camels. First I was creeped out, but now I understand it goes with the territory.

At 12:16 PM, Blogger Fly said...

In defense of friendster I'd like to add I prolly never would have ran back into SC if it wasn't for that. Whether or not thats a good thing for her not is still up to debate.

As far as the drinks go, don't worry about it buddy. It was just a drink.

At 4:04 PM, Anonymous rockstar said...

When I'm referring to morons from my party, I'm referring to my birthday party in January. Not my recent karaoke performance.

Blogs are more dangerous than friendster...but that's for another day.

- Rockstar


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