Cafe Desperation

Cafe Spice should change it's name to "Mangsho Bazaar" (that's meat market in Bengali).

After a certain hour, when the kitchen closes and the smells of curry and paratha drift away, the bar becomes the main attraction and smells of perfume, smoke and desperation fill the air.

It was a pretty emotional weekend for me.

That's it. I'm not going out anymore, it's always a disappointment anyway.
For some reason, whenever I go out I feel like Holden Caulfield in The Catcher in the Rye. And I realize how lonely so many people are. And they think that the cure for loneliness is going out to a club or bar and surrounding yourself with alcohol, smoke, and a bunch of yuppies practicing their mating ritual. It just made me feel bad for them.

When I was in the bathroom, I was at the sink washing my hands and this attractive Indian woman comes up to me and my friends and goes "Hey, are you guys from Philly?" We said yes. Then she proceeded to tell us her interests, the fact that she was a Pharmacy professor and that she was single and looking. And her solution to her singledom was to start organizing yuppy happy hours. She handed us all small pink flyers and goes "Tell all your professional, OLDER friends." She really emphasized the "older" part. I took that to mean people that a) are finished education and employed, b) not living with their mama, c) don't have posters of Tupac/Sid Vicious hanging over their twin-sized bed, and d) aren't thugged out individuals who start conversations with people of the opposite sex by moving close to them, shrugging their shoulders and saying "So, what's up?"

This woman was attractive and smart (a professor!) and the whole time I was thinking "Why are you trying so hard? You don't have to." It was like watching those dating videos that they show to introduce the contestants in Blind Date and Fifth Wheel..... But live! Well, at least I have to give her credit for putting herself out there like that. I couldn't do it. It just made me feel bad for her..... And for no reason, I got kind of emotional. But I hid it for the whole night of course.

Anyways, if anyone wants to go (I'm typing out the flyer).....
Rinx & Sonny from AAINA present Philly's Own Happy Hour for Professionals. Thursday, August 19, 2004 at Paradigm (239 Chestnut Street Philadelphia, PA) From 7 p.m. to 12 a.m. + (Free Admission), Ladies 21 and Gents 23+, $3 drinks till 8 p.m. and $5 thereafter. Corporate & Business-Chic attire is mandatory. Mission Statement: To create an exclusive networking atmosphere at the finest locations in Philadelphia for professionals of all backgrounds. AAINAhappyhours@yahoo.com

When I woke up Sunday morning I knew that I wanted to start making changes in my life. I started with battling my dehydration..... a result of drinking from the night before. I tried to imitate this fruit soup recipe that I once had for brunch at this West Philly diner, Rx. I blended Cantaloupe and some ice cubes and threw in a handful of blueberries. It was really close, and refreshing, but you know how somethings can never be recreated? I'm gonna try it again with coconut milk some other day.

I re-read A Catcher in the Rye for the rest of the afternoon. Man, I wish I could write J.D. Salinger a letter. That book has so much more meaning to me now than the first time I read it. I cried as I turned the pages, my eyes got blurry with salty discharge, but I kept reading anyway.

Some people have religion, some have rehab, I have really good friends and Holden Caulfield.